Thursday, May 22, 2008

Out-ray-geeus newz!

I haz justee heard dis: da momee iz packin' her bagz & leavfun TODAY to go vizit her sissie & her momee bean in Cally-four-knee.
She can still barely funkshun, but oh boy, off she goez!! No thoughts to my bloggie or to da dadee. (He will starvz to death cuz he can only cooks taterz & tomaterz.)

& justee looks at da MESSEE on MY kitschen tabull!! What IZ all dat junk? She didz not cleanz house cuz she iz hurted.

& when are we gonna vizits all our frendz? Probabully not until a bazillyon yearz. She sez next Wednezday, I say, "PTOOEY! Dubull hairballz!"

Here iz what I did. I yam takin ackshun into my own pawz (see below pic fur plan A). (Oh, & justee LOOK at dat louzy pic! She iz reeely gettin' sloppy.):



CLASSIFIED ADS

WANTED: TYPIST & PHOTOG-FURR

If you canz types wit all ten fingerz (or paw padz... I will consider training an anymal) & are REEELYABULL & nots too broken down in da body, you may qwalifly.

I offer da followin' perks: Snorin' in bed evfurry mornin', drinkin' hot fresh roastied coffee dat da dadee here makesez, a nice gardun in da summer (y'better likes pullin' weedz!), & plenty o' cats to keeps you entertained.

Pleeze do nots expectee too much green paperz in remunerayshun... (I haz a itty bitty stash frum my cookin' job.) but we can givez you lots of nose kissez & hair ballzez. (Howevfur, don't evfun DREAM of leavfun us, or I will peez in your pursee!)

Pleeze call (PPLEEEEZE!!!): 1-800-SAV-ACAT


Well dats should takes care of most of da problum. I hopes I gets 680,00 callz. Denz we can all gets goin' & vizit.

Remeburr, I lovez you, evfun if I din't gets a chancee to vizit before da momee left.


40 comments:

lambj said...

Thanks, Dr Tweety! Victor is oblivious that Bonnie's not here. She's very, very sick and they don't know why. We already had to decide to give her another chance, and the next few hours will tell.
Your want ad is very, very cute. Maybe we'll send the boy, but he doesn't drink coffee and can't tell a weed from a rose. But he loves kitties!
Purrs!

Bounce, Lucy and Trixie said...

Dearest Auntie Stinkie,

I am on my way over to keep you company while your Mom is gone. I cannot bear for you to be sad, so I will cheer you up!

Love and kisses,
Your Bounce

Willow said...

That is very sad that your Mommee would leave you to go to California. Maybe someone will answer your ad but I can't let my Food Lady see it because I need her here with me. You still look very handsome there on the table - maybe I can come over and visit while your Mommee is gone.

Purrrrrrrs, Willow

Gandalf & Grayson said...

Dr. Tweety, we think your ad should attract many a good typist. We know purrzactly how you feel, our Mom left us for 3 nights for a long Sister Weekend last week.

Cheysuli and gemini said...

That is an excellent want ad!

Wedding Guest said...

Tweety!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How can your Mom lrave a kitty that is as handsome as you?????!!!
You are smart to take action,heehee
I think it might be hard to replace your Mom and she did say she will be back :/ Let me know how the responses go ;)
Don't worry,your friends will look after you! We can't have you be alone!!!!!!!!!!!
Purrs Mickey

felinesopher said...

hahaha...you're so funny & cuite Dr. Tweety:)

hmm...actually, we're thinking of your ads there, maybe we could fill in the job you offered? who knows might help our mommy so she won't get too tired taking care the 12 of us here...

-meaouwy troops-

HotMBC said...

Oh Dr Tweety, I'll come and purr with you. I'd like a snuggle too. It makes me very sad that Bonnie is gone and Mom squished me too much hugging me. I'll be right there.
::smoochiez::
da Mini

Daisy said...

Oh no, not again! I hope your mom does not overdo it, too.

Tybalt said...

Don't feel bad, Dr Tweety! We'll all wait for you to be able to visit. I wish I could let you share my mommy, but I don't think she knows how to teleport.

Angus Mhor said...

Delilah, I will miss you so..Wednesday is so very fur away! And my heart is sad for Victor and his family on their loss of Miss Bonnie. I am teleporting over to find comfort in your company.

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Oh, no, you're being dumped! And seriously, as in immediately, with no warning, gone for a week dumped.

You do need a new typist. We would volunteer Jan. She doesn't leave home with packed bags but she always has an excuse why she can't help us, so we need her here.

We hope you and your daddy don't starve. After a week of potatoes and tomatoes, you'll be glad to see your mom return. Even if she did DUMP you.

See you next week, Dr. T.

Tesla said...

I mad yoo mommeh left yoo! I sink meh mommeh is leavin sumtim in july, and i sink yoo mus teach meh sum tricks ta make her stay. Lets brainstorm.

goldenshade said...

So funny!!!!!

Shade and I will be over to help keep you and the gang entertained. We are working on a comedy routine.

~Goldie

JB's Big World said...

I am sorry your mommy has left. I will teleport over and bring nip too!
--JB

MoMo said...

What? Your mommee is gone again? Oh dear! If you get lots of good applicants please send some over to me because I am not getting any work out of my SS. And she is going to leave me for 7 weeks in June/July for a survey in Xinjiang Now, I ask you, is that fair? These humans have no sense of responsibility.

The Taylor CatSSSSS said...

Great ad! Mommy wants to apply for the job!

Sunny's Mommy said...

Oh my goodness! I cannot believe she's left you. Again. I hope you've received a ton of phone calls in response to your ad. Good luck interviewing and I hope you find a excellent, qualified replacement candidate soon!

(Then your Momee will be really sorry :-p)

Name: Mr. Hendrix said...

Your ad is great! let me know how it works. I need a back up for when mommy sluffs off.

i hope your mommy gets home soon soon soon. ((hugs)) to you this weekend.

Tiger Lily said...

Oh my! We hope you and your Daddee survive while your Mommee is gone!!

{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}} to all of you from all of us. We will miss Bonnie very much.

Jemima, Zeke, Sushi, Tiger Lily and Ruckus

Chairman Mao said...

Wowie, that is a great ad! I'm sorry yur Momma is goin away again!

We Ballicai wanna send you bunchies of hugs and tell you how honored we are that you are our furriends.

Lots of love and kittyhugs and purrs from MaoMao!

Skeeter, LC, and Ayla said...

Good luck wif da ads! We hope ya fine a more reeliabul typist!

We is sendin hugs out ta efrykittie abour Bonnie...

(((HUGS)))

The Taylor CatSSSSS said...

(((((HUGSSSSS))))) from all the Taylor CatSSSSS!

Ariel said...

Lol...Your so adorable I'm sure you'll get lots of responds. If any of you get hungry your always welcome at my house :)

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Oh, Dr. T and the Fab 5, we came by to give you all {{{{{HUGS}}}}} from all of us at JFF, in memory of Bonnie Underfoot.

Parker said...

Oh my, I think you might want to keep your Mommy. It's hard to train new help!
(((((HUG!!!)))))

brandi said...

here is something to help you through this:

((((((((((HUGS))))))))))

The Taylor CatSSSSS said...

Happy Memorial Day!

For Our Troops:
NEVER FORGET
EVER HONOR

Ariel said...

Justing dropping in to say hi to my sweet friends. If your hungry I brought some sandwiches and mom helped me make some catnip tea.

Sassy Kat said...

Poor sweetie, getting left alone and not able to visit with your friends. We are all together as the SS and mom's of the house are dumping us so we are sticking together and visitng in a group. Please visit when she gets back home. Hope you find that typist.
Roscoe, Sassy, Momo & Opus

Black Cat said...

Oh Dr Tweety, how can da Momee leave you lovely kitties and da Dadee for such a long time? I am applying for the post of typist and photographer. I can type with all ten fingers. I might not qualify though because I'm a bit broken in the body and living in England might make for a bit of a long commute, lol!!! :) xxx

HotMBC said...

Dr Tweety, I'd loan you my typist sometimes, but she's not very good either. She's bizzy. And sometimes she even furgets to give me treats! *sigh* Come on ofur and share some toona with me. I figured out how to get it open.
Purrrrrrrrrrs
::smoochiez::
da Mini

SophieKitty said...

Your mom owes you big for this!

Quasi said...

Dr., I'm in California...do you want me to track your mom down and send her home? BTW, your Dad will do just fine on potatoes and tomatoes. Just make sure he doesn't try helping himself to YOUR food. That will not do at all.

felinesopher said...

How're you doing guys....

We lost our tiny troop today, Monskitt, she went to bridge of rainbow last nite....and mommy Bunyu still not coming home, we're hoping she'll be back soon.

-meaouwy troops-

Karen Jo said...

Your Mom should be home later today. I hope you guys did all right while she was gone. Did you get a lot of applications for typist and photographer?

Scout said...

That is a good idea!! My mommy is sucking at the helping me blog thing too. If you get an applicant from Tennessee, let me know. I will share my Temptations with them. *crosses paws*

Junior said...

It is terrible when our Meowm's leave!!!!! I hope you are able to find a suitable replacement, or that your current one straightens out her act soon!

Victor Tabbycat said...

I's sorry you didn't know bout Bonnie til now. I see my comment frum last Thursday, made while Bonnie was at the vet. My beans has been sad so I's been lettin them brush me more, play wif me more, an treat me more. Bonnie will nefur be furgotten.
Last weekend was officially fur huggin in Bonnie's memry, so...
(((((((HUGS))))))) frum alla us to alla yous. An purrs.

Angus Mhor said...

Delilah! Delilah!

::said in Marlon Brando voice with STELLA! inflection::

I miss you so!

Celly-bratin life in Orry-gone