Friday, November 30, 2007

Worry-some & frazzled Fry-day

Update on Auntie Stinkie: Da dadee justee called from da VET. Auntie Stinkie haz partially detached retinaz & high blood pressure. Da vet took some blood tests & urine samplez.We won'ts know until Monday if dere iz anyting else wrong. Auntie Stinkie will have to take da high blood pressure pillz fur da restee of her life, but da VET tinks she will be OK now, except she iz not goin' to be abull to see us furry well.(Mebbe we can get away wit some bad behaviorz?) She iz eatin' good & she iz REALLY happy to be at home wit us other cats.
I yam worryin’ today. Da dadee iz takin’ Auntie Stinkie to da VET. Da momee haz noticed dat ovefur da lastee year, Aunte Stinkie waz havin’ a hard time seein’ stuff. She still waz goin’ outside & stoppin’ da beanz car & sunnin’ herself on da front porchee, but she waz also head-bumpin’ into stuff. Da beanz just thought dat dis waz part of Auntie Stinkie’z gerry-theatric yearz. Den, da momee realized dat Auntie Stinkie could no longer see anyting at all! She iz not quite as Alpha az she waz either, I haven’t been whapped by da Auntie in a couple ‘o weeks & dis iz worryin’ me sometin’ fierce. Pleaze send lot’s of purrz our way… we needz ‘em. & da momee iz feelin’ mostee worried. We lovez our Auntie Stinkie wit incredi-bull amounts.

Thursday, November 29, 2007

Thurz-day 13 (sorta) & Henry's (Miss Peachy'z) meme

I yam finally getting’ around to doin’ da meme dat Henry Helton tagged me fur. Boy, da momee haz really been un-helpful wit da bloggie dis week. Now, dis iz what I found in my treasure boxee when I opened it up yester-day (no, not me silly! da listee, da listee)

1) My frendz of da bloggo-spear. Dere iz a ton o’ dem!!! Dey justee keeps on bein’ da highlite of my day. (Though I wishez dat I had more time at da comp-hooter, ‘cuz da momee justee doesn’t quite get how important dis iz to my more-all.)

2) I found a pic of me when da momee first reskewed me. I yam sittin’ in a metal bucket under a ta-bull out in da yard. Dis waz my refuge to hide from humanz when I waz left alone. Since I waz abandoned & left to starve, I needed dis litty-bitty place of security. But den when I started to come inside da momeez house, I didn’t need my bucket anymore.

3) I yam puttin’ in my frend Delilah. When da beanz brought dat itty-bitty kitten home, I wanted to smack & bitey & growl at her. But den I realized dat she had nice earzez & I licked ‘em & dey waz nice soft itty-bitty earz. So dat nice kitten waz da firstee true cat frend I ever had. (Da mad Burr-man Maxi doezn’t count ‘cuz he iz too moody & crabby.)

4) Oh, & I will always love my old palz, da dadeez catz dat went over da rainbow brig-gez. Dey waz nice to me when I moved into da dadeez house in Ory-gone. I only got a few hissez & smacks from dem. Den dey waz my palz, espeshully Trixie da Calico. She & I used to have long conversationz in da garage & hide under boxez & stuff. I missez her. I kinda had a big crushee on her evfen if she waz older den me.

5) Den I yam goin’ to put da dadee in. He iz da only one dat truly understandz me. Oh sure, da momee brushes me & takes pix & helps me wit da bloggie & all dat, but it iz da dadee dat iz so know-ledge-a-bull about my winning person-alley-tea. He boxes wit me & he lets me in & out & in & out, & he never once com-plained about my liftin’ my tail all over da house when I moved in. I did da pee ting on many, many ob-jext of hiz, but da dadee never threw me out. Only da momee shrieked & carried on like it waz da end of da world. & she still doez!!!

6) & dere iz much MUCH more to deze treasurez, but I gotta go…. I see Delilah haz got a ‘nip mousee, so I yam gonna see if I can gets it away from her. “Delilah? Here kitty-kitty!” Oh fur heavenz sake! Dere she goez into her rat cave!

So now I will tag my pal Fat Eddy. Here iz da meme for da other frendz who stop by to vizit today:

A SIMPLE BUT VERY IMPORTANT MEME: List your treasures and tag other kitties and their humans also, as many as you like. Let this reflection spread through out the world. We need to count our contentments as Blessings!
~~~What do you look back over and treasure enough to place inside your BOX OF LIFE?~~~

Monday, November 26, 2007

Mun-day after partee man-day

Good Gawd-free!! Da beanz finalee came home. I yam EX-HOGSTED! What a turkey day partee waz had wit all my blogo-spear frendz. We ate lizard stew, ham & turkeyz & minced-meetz & mouseez until we waz so stuffed we just barelee cleaned up da messy before da beanz walked in da door. The partee kinda went on fur a longer time den we firstee planned. mebbe 48 hourz or so.

Az you can see, I yam kinda' hung overz from too many 'niptiniz, so I yam gonna be a itty-bitty slower answerin' all my frendz dis week. But I lovez you all fur comin! We had such a GOOD time! & da cat-sitter waz a fine specy-mint. She did not even tattle on us! She even helped gets da meat & da piez in & out & in & out of da oevfun! She can come back anytime.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Tuxie Tired Tuez-day & Tur-key Day Parteeee!

I yam givin’ over da blog today to my frend & housemate Delilah. Delilah? Here Kittee Kittee! Oh gallopin’ ballz o’ hair! Would you look at dat? She haz fallin’ asleeps in da lid of da Scrab-bullz boxee!.

She had been keepin’ score of da beanz Scrab-bullz game & makin’ some secret callz on da dadeez cell phone. I yam tinkin’ dis ovefur care-fully & after my palz ovefur at da Crew & Dragonheart pointed out da sus-pish-us acitviteez of da ‘nip on da ta-bull yester-day, Delilah might have been callin’ Catnip Anony-moose on da side! My bestee frend Henry Helton may have helped to set dis up.
Now, I haz an update on da Tur-key party at my housee. We gots a different cat sitter at da lastee moment! Tank GAWD it iz not dat yahoo from down da road. He did not evfun know cats & da momee waz afraid fur us. So da dadee got da nice gurl from da VETS office to come out & gives us some atten-shun. & guess what? She will not mind if 85 catz from da blogo-spear come ovefur!!! She will even helps get da tur-keyz out of da ofven. & Fat Eddy & his brudder Phinney iz bringin’ da pump-da-kinz piez!!!! Eric & Flynn iz comin' ovefur & bringin' mince-meatz.

I tink Daisy might bring some lizard stew & Chairman Mao will be chief barf flinger. We haz a entire con-tingy-ant of black kitteez comin’, includin’ da Black Cat, Mr Hendrix, Mickey, Nicky & all da black & white catz from Hot(m)bc, includin’ my sweetie Mini. Kelly tought mebbe he could bring a big mousee just to liven tingz up if we gets too tired from eatin’ too much tur-key.

I tink a few torteez & calicoz are comin, so we gots Gretchen & Faz & Little Catzee.

Caesar & Princess & Pixie & Miss Peachy will help Auntie Stinkie set up da Red Hat Cat Club in da muzik room. Dere may evfun be tea served.

The Furry Kids are comin & bringin’ da nice big eared white D-A-W-G! I yam sure Samanth & Tigger will bring dat other nice D-A-W-G, the Devil Dog. Kellie da Orange Cat iz goin’ to helps answer da door, & Gemini will hand outs da tur-key day party favorz.

Mebbe her housemate Chey will regal us wit her wild adventurez of da Sopranoze. Da Meezerz, Kaze, Latte & Chase, & Scout & Kimo (& hiz brudder Sabi) will assist Maxi da mad Burr-man in plannin’ gamez for meezerz. & I yam countin’ on doze cats dat can drive, like Zippy, Sadie & Speedy to shuttle cats back & forth to our housee from da teleporter, so da neigh-borez do not gets sus-pish-us.

Az fur bloggin’, well dats another story. Da beanz iz leavin tonight fur LaLA Land, & might, I uze da word MIGHT, be able to check in on us from dat remote place over da next five dayz. But since dey won’t evfun be here fur tur-key day, I yam not countin’ on dis at all. Da only tingz I can count on at dis point are my frendz from da cat blogo-spear. & we will leave a mightee fine messee fur when da beanz come home!!!!!!


Monday, November 19, 2007

Mon-day Mad-ness!!!

Dis iz what da gurls were up to. Dis iz unbleeva-bull! Da following sequinz iz bein' narrated by my frend Delilah, da grey & white tuxedo cat, & da Auntie Stinkie:

"Oh lookee! Is that nip Auntie Stinkie?"
"Oh yeah, it's nip allright! And right on da beans dining table no less!"
"Auntie Stinkie, my head is beginning to feel fuzzy, ah, flurry, ah blurry!"
"Oh my goodness. What is daddy doing? Is he nipping with us?"
"Uh oh! Now daddy is getting flurry...ah... blurry.... uh, Auntie Stinkie????"
Az you can see, tingz at our housee iz gettin' pretty strange. Da beanz leavin' iz drivin' 'em to nip. Az fur me & Iris, we iz stayin' out of it! We iz sleepin' through Monday on da couch. After all, dat iz da only reazona-bull ting to do!!!

Friday, November 16, 2007

Fry-day, Floofy Fry-day

Here az you can see, I yam fixin’ my furz up. You would tink dat dis might be a private affair, since it involvez my private parts…. But NO, az many of my frendz haz reported, it iz simply another photo op fur da momee. Not only doez I have to put up wit dis monkey-bizness, all us Fab Five iz goin’ to deal wit da pet sitter.

Bah! I yam goin’ to savez up ALL my hairballz & ptooey dem all at once. Dis should cause da pet sitter to slip on hiz way in da door. At dat critical junk-sure, all us 85 catz at da tur-key-day party will jumps on him & let him have it! I esty-mates dat abouts 32 hairballz, 36 stinky poops, & mebbe 27 & a halfs of chewed & upchucked kibblez otta do it. Den we will havz da house to ourselvz fur da party.

I haz mastered turnin’ da oven on & off, & uzin’ da mitts to gets da panz in & out. My new recipeez from Saveur haz me uzin’ a hazel-nut stuffin wit apricots, chix-hen liverz & cranberryz. Mebbe I will add a little brandy at da lastee minute. Dis will carmelize da onionz & da tur-key will be purr-fect fur all my frendz. Dis iz my plan of action & I yam stickin’ to it!

Thursday, November 15, 2007

I just got dis award!

My pal Henry Helton, dat upstandin' city-zen of da cat wurld, haz given dis to me & da other cats here at da house. We all say TANKS Henry!!! We lovez you too & you alwayz makes us smile. We will pass dis on to our frend Scout da Meezer, cuz she is furry cute & smart.

Thurz-day Mad 13

Okay. I yam goin’ to do this 13 ting on my own, cuz I yam mad. Here are 13 tingz I yam mad about & planz of action (Tanks to Kellie da Orange Cat fur suggestin’ takin’ action.):

1) Look at dis pic. Do I not LOOK peeved? I yam! 100%. Da momee thought it would be “cute” to shoot my pic through da front window of da door. Az if. &, she bleached all da colorz out of it.

2) It iz cold. I should be allowed to stayz indoorz all day & night, and den let in again when I wants. Dis iz my schedule, not da beanz! Open up dat door momee!

3) It iz raining. Do I looks good wit WET furz???? How will I win da poster boy contest fur 2008 if I have wet DREADLOCKS???

4) Dere are vishus vegan deerz out in da frontee yard.

5) Deze vishus vegan deerz chase cats in our neigh-bore-hood. Just da other mornin’, da momee saw one chasin’ da next door cat & den da dadee saw it chasin’ da same cat in da evenin’. Dis should be against da law!

6) I vow to chase da vishus vegan deerz back into dere hidin’ placez. Of course, I may send my brudder da mad Burr-man to accomplish dis feat.

7) Da momee posted a pic of beefs yesterday, which offended some of my frendz. Why Gemini and da Crew thought dat mebbe I waz callin’ dem cowz, & dey scared da dickens out of Bounce, Lucy & Trixie.

8) Henry Helton & da Black Cat could be right: Eat deze tingz before dey eatz you!

9) It iz gloomy. Dere are grey cloudz evfurrywhere. I have da SAD dis-order. In order to combat dis SAD ting, I has to eat more. Den I begin to rezembull da cowz.

10) It iz mizerabull. I hates da fact dat I cannot be in da gardun of peas. I usually get to help da momee & da dadee plantee stuff. But evfurry ting iz dyin’ out dere & we will not have a outside dinner & fire until next YEAR!!

11) It iz almost turk-ey day. & GUESS WHAT???? Da beanz are leavin’ nextee Wed-nez day, & will be gone fur 4 ENTIRE dayz. We will not even get a sniff of tur-key!

12) We are goin’ to have a “pet” sitter. Dis guy iz some old yahoo from down da road who haz D-A-W-Gs! What doez he know about cats??? What iz he goin’ to feed us? Certainly not tur-key. Certainly no ham. & definitely no roatsie beefs. I can’t even have a tur-key day party wit my blogo-spear frendz. Or can I? Will you all teleport over while da beanz leave fur LaLa Land & leavez us Fab Five ALL ALONE?????

13) You guessed it! Izn’t da lastee 12 reazonz enough to be furry furry mad??????

PS: If you would like to party at our house over tur-key day, teleport on over. I yam learnin’ to run da oven & I haz great gor-may recipeez from da mag Saveur. I make a mag-nifico gravy!!! We will have da run of da house to ourselvz & I tink I know how to get rid of da “pet” sitter fur good. 85 cats in one house!

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Word-less Wednez-day

Okay. I yam speech-less. Deze are not cats! Where are da cats? Where did da momee find deze big beefs? I yam nuthin’ less den astonished at dis betrayel of my blog. & just lookee at dat one wit da mouth in a sloppee grin. Okay. I know dis iz supposed to be a Word-less Wednez-day…but just how much can a cat be expected to take? Ptooey! TRIPLE hairballz on da grinning beefs noggin.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Tuez-day & I yam back!!!!!

Boy have I missed my frendz in da cat world. Az seen in da pic below, my toezez grew fur while I waz waitin’ fur da momee to come home from da Auntie Cue show. She got waylaid in a bad storm & her itty-bitty car got blown around on da free-way into da nextee lane offur!!!! Dis waz a furry scary ting & she had to pull over in Kalama Washington fur awhile until she had da nervez to get back on da free-way. Da whole time she waz just tinkin’ about seein’ us kittez & da dadee & cookin’ us roastie chix-hen fur dinner. She also knew I waz waitin’ effur so pay-shentlee fur her to help wit da blog & vizit my frendz.
So after a furry long trip, she walked in da door, and den started to laugh when she saw dat I waz pretending to be asleep & my furz had poked out between my toezez. I yam so glad da momee iz home safe. It will take us some time to get caught up. But we intend to vizit evfurry-buddy dis week!

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Thurz-day 13 Toez-day & an award!!!!!

First, I yam goin to thank my frendz Eric & Flynn fur givin me dis award! Da “I love your blog award.” Dis bringz tearz to my blue eyeballz. I yam goin’ to have to brushee up my fur pantz so I can accept dis wit grace.

Momee? Will you help me wit da brushee? Should I wear a bow-tye or sumpin’? Momee? Where is she?! Oh yeah..gettin’ ready to leave on da Auntie Cue show, AGAIN!!! Doez she not understand dat dis blog iz my passion???? Ptooey!!! I will leavez a big hair-ballz on da front door step fur her. Or, mebbe even on da livingroom car-pet. Mebbe she will step in it wit her fancy shoez.

Now dis iz my brudder da mad Burr-man Maxi. I talked a little before about hiz speshul toezez, but da pix did not show clearly what ex-actlee iz on hiz feet. Da Burr-man haz abouts 13 toezez on one foot & 10 toezez on da other.

I tink dis qwalifiez fur a Thurz-day 13…although da list would go sumpin’ like dis:
1) Toezez on Maxi’s foot
2) Toezez on Maxi’s foot
3) Toezez on Maxi’s foot
4) You guessed it! & on & on until der are many, MANY toezez listed on da page.

Da momee tinks dat da reason someone gave da Maxi to da shelter iz because of his so many toezez. Dey requirez some speshul care & hiz sharpeez must be cut by da VET if dey curl inwardz too far. Mebbe dis iz why he iz perpetu-ously GRUMPY?????? But, da momee & da dadee still lovez him despite it all, & dey lovez his speshul feet wit doze GIANT toezez.

Pee-S: Da momee sez I has to wait until Monday da 12th to rezume my blog, cuz of da Auntie Cue show. Dis iz fine wit me, since I will pee-wee on her suit-case before she leavez & hawk up dat big one!

I yam passin' on da blog award to: Forty Paws!!!!

Wednesday, November 7, 2007

Word-Less Wednez-day: Peace at Last

Finally.. got my Saveur turkey issue back from Auntie Stinkie!!! & now I yam dreamin' about turkeys & peas!

Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Tux-ie Tum-ee Tuez-day

I am Dr Tweety’s frend & housemate, Delilah. Today I am showing my pet nip mousee that dadee bought me while momee was at the last antique show. I have heard that momee is leaving again this Friday & won’t be back until Monday!!! Can you believe it?

At this point, there is only one thing to do, & that is to inhale deeply of the nip, bite the mousee a few times, & roll onto my back & stay there until momee comes home. As you can see in the picture below, I have subdued the mousee quite nicely.
I thought the other cats in the blogo-sphere would like to see the perfect white hour-glass on my tummy & my glossy furs. I keep my furs glossy by eating at least six Greenies a day. But this is ALL the beans will give me. They say I am a “big girl.” Of course I am! I am a rat. A grey, glossy rat. That is what momee tells me every single day. Why should I disbelieve her?

Monday, November 5, 2007

Mon-day Pink Man-day

Today I yam wearin’ pink all over. Dis iz ‘cuz I do not have a pink wig to put on like Daisy & her momee. I don’t tink I would wear a wig howefur, even if I had one. So please do not send me any wigz!

I just wants to show da man-cats dat you can be furry manly, even while wearin’ pink. I wonder if da Governor Terminator would tink I waz a girlie girl? Well, dat is OK. I knowz I yam a man-cat. & no-onez can tellz me di-fur-rent!

Saturday, November 3, 2007

Sat-ter-day iz hard to take!

Ok-ee-do-kee. Here I yam, just en-joyin' da Sat-er-day by layin' purple-dicular in my favo-rite chair... when all of a sudden.......... You guessed it! Da momee comez along & sticks dat cam-ruh in my face!

Da only reazon-abull ting to do iz bitey da strap & pull it outta her hand!
Den, if she rezists stoppin' da photo shoot, I just sticks my tongue out at her. Okay, I know dis iz bad of me, but what else can a cat do under deze de-plor-a-bull circum-dances? After all, not a treat-payment in sight!

Friday, November 2, 2007

Fry-day, tank Dawg its Fry-day

Here iz me, on da ta-bull again. I tink Fry-day iz a day to lounge. Dadee iz home wit us kitteez today & da poor momee iz stuck at work on her comp-hooter. But I have called her on da phone & told her what to say in my blog. I yam tryin’ to do yoga in dis pic, ‘cuz I tink da yoga will help tone my abz. Mini? Are you lookin’ at dis tum? I yam tryin’ fur da Him-uh-lay-ant poster boy of 2008. Will I make it? Or will my frecklez rule me in-illega-bull? Ptooey! Double hair-ballz if dey don’t pick me. My frendz luff me anywayz. & I love dem!

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Henry Helton's Cherish Meme

Auntie Stinkie gets a kiss from Delilah

Henry Helton’s cherish meme

1. Tell us what is the most sweetest warm thing you will do to your mommy (what is the sweetest thing that your kitty will do to you)
2. And, hug your mommy, tightly... (and, hug your kitty....tightly...)
3. Tag your good friend...
4. Leave your computer, and continue to hug each other.

We got tagged by Henry a couple of days ago fur dis Cherish Meme, in honor of Miss Peach. So all of da catz in dis house are goin’ to play today:

1. Tell us what is the most sweetest warm thing you will do to your mommy:

Dr Tweety: Oh, dis iz easy!!! I will follow da momee out to da garden in da spring, summer & da fall, & sit wit her in da twy-lite. We watchez da veggy-tablez grow-up togedder. Den da momee makes me a special fire in da fire-bowl (dis iz not like a tuna bowl—dere iz no food in da fire bowl!) & I hang out wit da momee until da starz in da sky come out.

Maximillian da mad-Burr-man:
I wait fur momee to come from work & den I comez out to da car to greet her & den I arch my back & sniff da car & straighten my tail & den I leadz her up da stairz & leaps onto da rail & walks down da rail to lead her across da porch to da front door. Momee could not get into the house if it were not fur me bein’ a good guard dawg. I am a husky. I know dis, ‘cuz she tellz me so.

Oh goodie! I like this meme. I get up evfurry morning and help my momee to put her make-up on. Sometimes I like to bite my momee’s nose, and other times, I like to bite her toes. But best of all, I play the rat game almost evfurry night with momee. I crawl into my rat cave that my momee makes from the throw on the big chair and then I crawl in till you can’t see me, and then I peek out at her. But if she calls me by my name, I growl at her, because I really am a RAT when I am in my cave!

I just love momee’s hair. I like to play the piano in momee’s hair. And when she is sitting on her porcelain cat-box, I come in and jump onto her shoulder. I leap from the floor and never, never put my claws into her. When she goes to bed, I go to bed too, and snuggle right next to her hair. I purr and purr and she sings to me. I love it when my momee sings my special lullaby. I am in kitty heaven.

Auntie Stinkie:
When momee gets up, I tell her “Waah, Waah!” This iz my signal for eggz. If it is play-day (the weekend), I sit on momee’s lap on my special knitted lap throw, and allow her to massage my face, shoulder blades and my little paws. Momee does a good toe massage. I simply cannot help myself from slipping into nirvana. I also meet momee when she comes home from work, and I plant myself right in front of her car so that she has to stop. I tell her, “Waah! Waah!” So then momee has to put on the emergen-cee brake, get out of her car and pick me up and drive the rest of the way into the driveway with me in the back or on her lap. This is to teach her to not go to work.

Now we iz goin’ to tag our frendz Kellie da Orange Cat, Mini (my sweetie!) and da ever luverly Samantha & Tigger!

Celly-bratin life in Orry-gone